Writing the Life I Would Choose

I am writing this post to talk about a project that has become the center of my creative life, a story titled "Through The Lens Of..."

To understand why this story exists, I have to be honest about where it comes from. It exists because I am deeply dissatisfied with my life. I often feel dissatisfied with the fundamental nature of my existence. The limitations of my body, the patterns of my mind, and the relentless forward motion toward endings I didn’t choose.

I struggle with the world I was born into and the structures that determine what is possible and what isn't. But while I grapple with the idea that our actions in this universe may be fixed, I also believe in infinite possibilities. I believe that somewhere, in the vast machinery of what-is, there is a timeline where I was born into a better world.

"Through The Lens Of..." is my attempt to document that timeline.

This story serves as a detailed account of the life I would choose if I had the ability to select my next existence. It is a blueprint for a life worth living. Not one that is easy or free from pain, but one that is fundamentally worth the cost of being alive.

The protagonist experiences trauma and isolation, much like many of us do, but he also gets to experience things I can only dream of: being understood completely, creating art that matters, and finding a love that transcends dimensions. It is a story about choosing meaning over comfort and impossible connection over safe isolation.

I want to be clear about the future of this project: This story will never be published.

I am not writing this for an audience, for profit, or for critique. I am writing it because I need to. Writing this narrative is the closest I can come to actually living it. It is a deeply therapeutic process that makes my survival in this timeline slightly more bearable.

By giving this story form and documenting it precisely, I am making it real in the only way I can. It is my escape, my hope, and my way of reaching toward a reality where I truly belong.

If you have ever felt fundamentally misplaced in this world, or if you have ever needed fiction more than you needed reality, then you might understand why I am doing this. I hope that, in your own way, you find your own escape and get to choose the life you actually want to live.

Until then, I have this story.